Emotional Reaction Tools

There are many tools that you can incorporate into your daily life to help avoid toxic emotional eruptions. Many of the tools listed below will assist you in gaining perspective. Once you start to see potentially upsetting situations as a small piece of your life, it will become easier to respond in a more productive way.

Here's a list of 5 proactive tools for preventing extreme emotional reactions:

1. Make looking at the positive side a regular habit - We all know at least one person who seems to find that silver lining in every stormy cloud. We are lifted by their presence because of this great attitude. This could be you! To begin to put a more positive spin on life, try to look at the positive aspects of situations at every opportunity. Then when a more challenging circumstance comes up, your brain will be trained to look for the bright side.
2. Cultivate a spirit of gratitude - Being thankful for all that you have is a great habit. When you start feeling thankful, you'll find you have more and more to be thankful for. This is a very easy, fun, and effective tool for decreasing stressful emotional responses.
3. Watch the words you use - Words that can cultivate toxic emotions include "should," "ought," "stress," "must," "busy," "worry," "he/she made me feel,", etc. Because it is often used to imply victimization, this language can allow us to feel powerless. Search for words of empowerment. These include "can," "will," "want," "choose," "love," and "peace." Try a thirty-day "diet" from the words  "worry," "busy," and "stress" and see what happens. The results can be remarkable. After thirty-days look for stress reduction, and a greater capacity for joy and inner peace.
4. Speak well of others - Avoid gossip. When discussing other people, think of how you would like to be spoken about. If you find yourself being tempted to say something negative about another person, see if you're bothered by a characteristic you are denying in yourself. When you accept that part of you, your feelings about the other person are likely to change.
5. Practice patience - One cause of unhappiness is a reluctance to wait for things to develop at their own pace. We can even steal some of our own joy in receiving by acting impatient about outcomes. Next time you find yourself growing impatient, relax and let the tension go. Trust in the process of life.

Learning to deal with emotional reactions doesn't have to be hard. Most of the time it takes looking inward and giving yourself the grace that you would give others. Learn to look on the positive side of things, cultivate a spirit of gratitude, watch the words you use with others and with yourself, learn to speak well of others and throw in a little patience. Be sure to trust in the process of life.

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